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The Garden of Earthly Delights
My Mind Is My Best Friend And My Worst Enemy
Princess Heechul (HanChul) 
15th-Nov-2011 06:37 pm
Title: Princess Heechul
Pairing: HanChul
Rating: PG
Genre(s): humor, crack
Word Count: 1,912
Summary: Heechul comes down with a cold and demands that Hankyung tell him a story. What results is a tale of the beautiful Princess Petal, a prince from a far away land, a pumpkin-eating bunny, a strange turtle, a polite horse, and a fabulous unicorn.


    “I'm so bored,” Heechul complained, stretching out across the bed and letting his arms fall dramatically onto the mattress.

    Hankyung sighed.

    “I don't know what you want me to do about that,” he told the other man, voice patient as always even though he found it a bit preposterous that he had to stay home with his sick roommate while their other roommates went out to dinner without them.

    Any outsider would wonder why a twenty-three year old man with a cold needed a babysitter, but Hankyung was confident that if they knew Heechul, they'd understand. Not that the other man was incapable of taking care of himself. It was that it was nearly impossible to tell him “no.”

    So when Heechul had whined to him about his sore throat and achy limbs, shooting him a shameless “aren't-I-so-pathetic” face, Hankyung knew that he'd end up sitting at the other's bedside that night while Heechul languished and complained.

    “You're supposed to be taking care of me,” Heechul huffed, kicking the blankets off his thin legs.

    “I am taking care of you,” Hankyung reasoned, running his fingers through his light brown hair. He pressed the balls of his sock-covered feet into the wood floor, anticipating further demands from his companion.

    “You should entertain me,” Heechul told him, sending him a charming smile. Which actually was charming despite the redness of his nose from constantly wiping it with tissues.

    “Would you like me to dance for you Princess Heechul?” he asked sarcastically. Though his words held no real bite. They both knew that.

    “Well...” Heechul teased, smiling wickedly before bursting into laughter, “Why don't you just tell me a story or something?”

    “About what?”

    “I don't know. It's your story.”

    Hankyung sighed but settled back more comfortably in his chair, stretching his sweat-pant covered legs in front of him and propping his feet on the bed.

    “Once upon a time-”

    “You're going to tell me a fairytale?” Heechul interjected incredulously.

    Hankyung shot him a pointed look and continued when it was clear that Heechul was at least listening for the time being.

    “Once upon a time,” he continued, “there was a beautiful princess named Petal. She was the most beautiful and alluring girl in her kingdom. In fact, she was the most beautiful girl in the surrounding kingdoms as well. She had long, lustrous black hair, big dark eyes, and milky white skin. Eligible princes from miles around sought her hand in marriage. However, Petal's parents, the king and queen, found that none of them were worthy of their daughter. So when they were contacted by the royal family in a far away land whose riches were greater than even their own, they readily agreed to the match.”

    “They are sending off their daughter to a complete stranger just because the guy's family is rich?” Heechul squawked indignantly.

    “Needless to say, the princess was unhappy with the arrangement. She refused to marry a man whom she had never even met. So one night, with the cover of darkness, she slipped quietly out of the castle with just one bag and into the stable to retrieve her trustworthy horse.”

    “She only has one bag? I highly doubt that a princess would only bring one bag to-”

    “This is my story, remember?” Hankyung reminded him, “And she was so against marrying a strange man, she was willing to leave her luxurious possessions behind in order to avoid her fate.”

    Heechul huffed, but was quiet.

    “So Princess Petal climbed onto the back of her trusty steed and rode off into the night, her silky hair flying behind her. She rode for hours through the woods in order to avoid having anyone see her. Because surely her parents had everyone in the kingdom looking for her as soon as they realized that she was missing at daybreak. She rode all through the night and on through the morning, only stopping at noon by a stream so her horse could drink and so she could take a nap.

    'I don't know what to do or where to go,' she said to her horse as she  stroked his velvet-soft nose.

    'I'm sorry. I cannot help you Princess. I have never been this far from the castle.'”

    “The horse talks now?”


    “That's completely unrealistic,” Heechul scoffed.

    “It's a fairytale,” Hankyung reminded him before continuing, “However, just then a small voice sounded from by their feet.

    'I can help!'

    The princess and the horse looked down to see a small, green turtle looking up at them with black, beady eyes.

    'How can a little turtle help me?' the princess demanded.

    'Be nice,' the horse reminded her.”

    “Where does a horse get off telling a princess what to do?”

    “Just listen, Heechul,” Hankyung sighed, “The turtle blinked up at them, shuffling toward the princess' feet until she got the hint and picked him up.

    'I've lived in these woods my entire life,' the turtle said, 'I can help you find your way around.'

    The princess looked at the shelled-creature skeptically.

    'You should bring him along,' the horse said, smiling at the turtle.”


    “So the princess climbed onto her horse's back and nestled the turtle into the folds of her skirt as they continued on their journey.

    The turtle directed them through the forest to a pumpkin patch since the princess hadn't been able to grab much food before she left.

    'Thank goodness I'm starving!' Petal exclaimed, sliding off the horse's back and onto the ground. She crouched in front of a pumpkin and proceeded to break it open as her horse nibbled on a pumpkin himself.

    'Hey! That was mine!'

    Petal looked down and saw a bunny with big, round eyes and a quivering, pink nose, staring up at her.

    'That was my pumpkin!' the bunny reiterated, pouting adorably in a way that only bunnies can. And while the princess was getting tired of woodland creatures telling her what to do, she could at least appreciate a good pout- she was the master of getting what she wanted with sad puppy dog eyes.

    'Who are you?'

    'This is my pumpkin patch,' the bunny said, 'I am the Pumpkin Prince.'

    'You see?' the princess announced, 'Without ever meeting the prince I'm meant to marry, I could end up engaged to a bunny!'

    'Hey!' the bunny pouted again, offended.

    'No offense,' the princess amended uncharacteristically.

    'Hmph,' the bunny sulked, 'And I was going to help you.'

    'You were?' the turtle questioned, interested.

    'Please excuse the princess,' the horse jumped in, 'We've been traveling for days and she's tired and hungry.'

    The bunny eyed the princess and sighed, deciding to forgive her for her earlier actions.

    'Earlier today I saw a  handsome man riding a unicorn!' he said excitedly, 'He stopped here to eat pumpkin just like you did.'

    'A unicorn?' the turtle asked, intrigued.”

    “A unicorn? Seriously?”

    “Yes, Heechul,” Hankyung replied, “A unicorn. And while Princess Petal was slightly hesitant to believe the bunny, the idea of a unicorn (and a handsome man) excited her. So she decided to    bring the bunny along with her to help her seek out the unicorn and mysterious man.

    The bunny sat in the folds of Petal's dress with the turtle and directed the horse in the direction where the man and unicorn had headed earlier that day.

    They rode through the afternoon, deciding to stop for a rest once dusk was upon them. However, as they began looking for a place to set up camp, they noticed that there was smoke coming from up ahead. Intrigued, they followed the glow that they could see through the trees and eventually came upon a campfire around which was sitting a man. A tall, fabulous unicorn with long legs and a purple, sparkly horn stood at the edge of the stream, drinking the water. It became clear that this was the pair that the bunny had been referring to.

    'It's him! It's him!' the bunny exclaimed, bouncing in the princess' lap.”

    “Duh,” Heechul rolled his eyes, “Who else rides around on a unicorn?”

    “The handsome man looked up at the sound of someone approaching and immediately stood to greet the beautiful woman who had arrived at his campsite,” Hankyung continued, undeterred, “Petal was rendered speechless for the first time in her entire life- awestruck by how handsome the man was as he neared her.

    'What brings you out into the middle of the forest, my lady?' he asked, taking her hand and helping her off her steed.

    'I am running away,' she announced, batting her eyes at him.

    'Why are you running away?' he pressed, leading her horse to the stream where his unicorn was standing, observing the visitors.

    'That's not important,' she told him, 'Why are you out here in the middle of the woods?'

    'I am on my way to wed a beautiful princess.'

    'What's her name?' she asked suspiciously.

    'Princess Petal,' the man said, eyes gleaming with love for a woman he had never even met.

    Petal was stunned. This was the prince whom she was to marry? This was what she was running away from? Suddenly, she felt a bit foolish. She wasn't betrothed to a bunny king or a king of vegetables. She was engaged to be married to this incredibly kind, handsome man.

    'What's wrong?' the man asked, seeing her stricken look.

    'I think I've made a mistake,' she confessed, ashamed, 'I'll just go.'

    Petal led her horse away from the stream and mounted him, setting the bunny and turtle in her lap as she turned her horse back in the direction of the palace.

    But her horse wouldn't budge.

    'Go,' she hissed, eager to get back to get away from this prince who would, no doubt, find her very foolish if he knew who she was. But still, her horse wouldn't budge. Instead, he turned around and walked back to the confused prince.

    'This is Princess Petal, your highness,' the horse announced. Petal wanted to flee.

    'Your horse talks?' the prince asked in wonder.

    'You have a unicorn,' Petal shot back.

    The prince shrugged.

    'So you are the beautiful princess to whom I am engaged?'

    'Yes,' she admitted.

    'Why are you running away?'

    'I didn't want to marry a stranger,' she explained, hoping that the prince wouldn't he offended.

    'I hope I haven't disappointed you, Princess.'

    'No,' she shook her head, black hair shining in the firelight, 'I think we should travel to the palace together.'

    The prince beamed and couldn't help but lean up to kiss the princess even as she sat atop her horse. The bunny hid in her skirts while the turtle stared unabashedly. And they lived happily ever after,” Hankyung finished.

    “Well, what happened to the unicorn?” Heechul asked.

    “I dunno,” Hankyung shrugged, “He went with them to the palace I guess.”

    “And the random turtle and bunny?”

    “They went too.”

    Heechul was silent for a moment, thinking.

    “That was really cheesy,” he announced finally, “And what kind of moral was that anyway? Just cross your fingers and hope your parents pick out an attractive spouse for you? Live by other people's rules? Don't piss off bunnies in pumpkin patches?”

    “I don't know Heechul,” Hankyung sighed, “I just made it up. I didn't really have a moral in mind.”

    “I know what the moral is,” Heechul said solemnly.

    Hankyung waited, watching as Heechul grinned mischievously.

    “Turtles are perverts,” he cackled.

    And that was as good a moral as any.

16th-Nov-2011 12:39 am (UTC)
spot for l2inl2in <3
16th-Nov-2011 12:39 am (UTC)
spot for onewlurver :)
16th-Nov-2011 01:44 am (UTC)
Ha ha ha, that was so cute and amusing XD It was especially funny how Heechul kept interrupting Hankyung (and Heechul actually brings up some good points, especially with the fate of the unicorn...)~ Loved this!
16th-Nov-2011 02:18 am (UTC)
thank you!
i'm so glad that you liked it!
and i definitely think that heechul would interrupt a lot.
thanks for reading and commenting!
16th-Nov-2011 05:39 am (UTC)
LMAO.... I have so much fun reading this....
I assumed *and imagined* the petal princess is heechul, the horse is siwon, the turtle is yesung, the the bunny is sungmin, the fabulous unicorn is zhoumi! and the pronce is hankyung himself.
I like this a lot..
16th-Nov-2011 06:12 am (UTC)
i'm so glad that you liked it! :)
yes! you got all of the cameos! i originally wrote this for a fiction class (changing hankyung's and heechul's names of course), so i made the references to the rest of super junior subtle XD
thanks for reading and commenting!
16th-Nov-2011 11:17 am (UTC)
You have fiction class????
i wish my school had been THAT cool. :/
16th-Nov-2011 01:28 pm (UTC)
well i'm in college (art school) so XD
16th-Nov-2011 06:58 am (UTC)
I dunno which was more entertaining, the story, or Heechul's quips ( Was that Zhou Mi the unicorn? And Sungmin and Yesung (Bunny and Turtle?))
16th-Nov-2011 07:03 am (UTC)
haha i'm glad you liked it!
yes! the unicorn was zhou mi, the bunny was sungmin, and the turtle was yesung. also, the horse was siwon and the prince was hankyung :)
thanks for reading and commenting!
16th-Nov-2011 07:51 am (UTC)
Yes, Yesung is a perv, and we love him that way.
This was fun! [wish I could tuck Sungmin into MY skirt]
16th-Nov-2011 01:29 pm (UTC)
lol thank you!
and pocket-sized sungmin would certainly be convenient!
thanks for reading and commenting!
16th-Nov-2011 08:24 am (UTC)
Hahaha this was cute, sweet and amusing ♥♥♥
16th-Nov-2011 01:30 pm (UTC)
thank you!
i'm glad you liked it!
thanks for reading and commenting!
16th-Nov-2011 10:24 am (UTC)
heenim! LOL!
16th-Nov-2011 01:30 pm (UTC)
haha glad you enjoyed it!
thanks for reading and commenting!
16th-Nov-2011 12:22 pm (UTC)
So so cute i love it!!!!!
16th-Nov-2011 01:30 pm (UTC)
thank you!
i'm glad you liked it!
thanks for reading and commenting!
16th-Nov-2011 01:15 pm (UTC)
I didn't guess Zhou Mi to be the unicorn, but anyway
THIS IS ADORABLE ahahahaha I love Heechul's snarky comments throughout and the ending X3
"turtles are perverts" XD
and all the little references *flails*
yes sungmin-bunny, you're the pumpkin prince, fret not, we're not taking that from you
lawl, this comment doesn't make sense, but i'm trying to say that i liked this fic :3
16th-Nov-2011 01:32 pm (UTC)
haha thank you!
yeah, i didn't really know what animal to make zhou mi, but i thought he'd make a good unicorn! lol
i'm glad you liked heechul's commentary
and sungmin will always be the pumpkin prince /nods
thanks for reading and commenting!
16th-Nov-2011 02:26 pm (UTC)
Oh my God I love you.
*bows to your awesomeness*
AHAHAHAHAHA this was priceless!
Zhou Mi would obviously be a huge sparkly, long legged unicorn. This is brilliant! :D
16th-Nov-2011 02:40 pm (UTC)
haha thank you!
i'm so glad you liked it!
and yes, zhou mi would totally be a unicorn /nods
thanks for reading and commenting!
17th-Nov-2011 08:31 am (UTC)
17th-Nov-2011 08:37 am (UTC)
haha i'm glad that you liked it!
thanks for reading and commenting!
24th-Jun-2012 03:46 am (UTC)
sooooooo cute! I love hanchul fluff! *otp feels*
24th-Jun-2012 04:07 am (UTC)
thank you!
i'm glad you liked it!
thanks for reading and commenting!
21st-Apr-2013 11:31 pm (UTC)
lol wow XDDDD
what an interesting story heeheehee
22nd-Apr-2013 01:15 am (UTC)
haha interesting indeed
thanks for reading and commenting!
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